This month, we look ahead to the holidays and how they affect our finances and family conversations. With the rising cost of almost everything, our annual celebrations are becoming more expensive.
I noticed it when we went to buy our Christmas tree. I started to pre-order a fresh one in early October, like I do every year, because they sell out. I was stunned to see the price had increased $70 this year, and the larger tree I really wanted was $180 more.
My vision was a tall, beautiful, ornament- and light-heavy balsam fir with a train running around it. But I hesitated.
I just could not pay that much for something that would last a few weeks. Thankfully, it seems others were holding off too, so they did not sell out this year. Last week, they offered a Groupon for the standard-sized tree at $40 off, and I ordered it.
That experience made me think about how we make these decisions and how so much of what we do during the holidays is based on tradition and habit, often without considering whether there is a better way.
Economic decisions begin with a goal. What are we trying to accomplish? For the holidays, we want to enjoy ourselves, spread some joy and create some wonderful memories with those we love. To accomplish our goals, we have to consider our limited money, time, energy, and talents and how best to use our resources.
Retailers count on us not to do this, instead making impulsive, last-minute purchases and spending more than we intended. Every year, we decide whether to travel to see family, how much to spend on gifts and how to host holiday celebrations. We want to be rational consumers, make good decisions and not fall prey to habits and marketing.
Traveling
For many families, the holidays would not seem complete without everyone gathering where we all grew up. Just look at how many films and songs have been written about going home this time of year.
However, more than one-third of shoppers are canceling or delaying holiday travel because of higher costs during the busiest travel days of the year, according to a 2026 holiday survey by Circana, a market research and data analytics company.
But many of us are still planning to travel.
On top of rising airfare and gasoline prices, travel comes with other costs, including time away from work, the stress of cancellations and bad weather, exhaustion, time spent in crowded airports and on traffic-filled highways and the real possibility of spending the holiday sick from the newest virus. Why on earth would anyone want to go through that?
Going home every year did not work for our family, so we agreed to get together every other year. Even without the high costs, those with children at home appreciate not having to travel every year.
Instead of doing what everyone else seems to be doing, consider planning a family gathering at not the busiest travel time of the year, around a birthday, summer vacation, or another time when travel might be less expensive, and everyone can spend more time together.
If you really miss your siblings, one thing we are considering next year is setting up a GoFundMe so we can share travel costs for family members who have to travel and might have difficulty affording it. To us, it seems fairer since they are making the effort to come.
Gift exchange
More than half of survey respondents (54%) wished their family and friends would stop exchanging gifts altogether, according to a 2026 Harris Poll on holiday shopping. Yet we keep doing it!
Most families have moved away from buying everyone a present to handing out gift cards or participating in white elephant exchanges. But are we really spreading joy, or just recycling the same $50?
The gift exchange didn’t work for us, so like some families, we buy gifts only for the children. In our family, children include all younger adults, and I think they look forward to the extra cash.
I know of several couples who take advantage of holiday sales to purchase something they really want for their home instead of buying presents for each other. That is good economic decision-making. I know a few families, especially with older children, who opt for family experiences like a cruise or a trip to an amusement park instead of more stuff.
Of course, you could also just buy gifts and give them throughout the year instead of waiting. If you find something a friend or family member would enjoy, you can just send it to them. Why limit the pleasure of giving to the holidays? A thoughtful surprise gift can mean so much more than a last-minute purchase of something the recipient neither wants nor needs, bought simply out of obligation.
Entertaining
When it comes to holiday dinner, if we made perfectly rational decisions, we would hold the celebration at the most comfortable, large, and conveniently located home. The food preparation would be done by the best cooks, and the family members with the most financial resources would pay for the meal.
Unfortunately, most of us don’t celebrate the holidays that way.
Surprisingly, about half of Americans now plan to order out for all or part of their Thanksgiving dinner, and more than 40% of families do what is called a hybrid potluck. With a hybrid potluck, the host generally prepares the main dish, and everyone else brings something.
But even turkeys have gotten more expensive, and the host also provides the home, decorations, pre- and post-meal cleaning, and much of the prep. Meanwhile, someone else’s contribution could be chips and soda. A study this year by Butterball found that 85% of hosts wished guests would help, and almost half said the most needed help is with cleanup. That does not sound fair or joyful.
If you like your potluck or ordering out and it works well for your family, keep doing it. It did not work for our family, so we tried something different. The women and some of the men in my family enjoy cooking together. My in-laws enjoy hosting but are retired on a fixed income.
My sisters-in-law and I bring or have delivered the ingredients for all the recipes and the tamales, along with snacks and baked goods we made, and we cook the meals together. It is mayhem, but so much more fun than a potluck. It is not a big deal if some contribute more food than others, and, unlike potlucks and takeout, the food is hot and fresh.
Debrief and change
It seems that after the holidays every year, we put away the decorations, forget what we just went through, and what did not work. We will probably repeat many of the same questionable decisions the following year.
Perhaps, instead, we should do a little post-holiday debriefing while we still remember what cost too much, what was too stressful and exhausting, and which traditions nobody particularly enjoyed. Then we can make some changes for next year.
One of the greatest aspects of American culture is how resilient and adaptable we are. We do not need to wait for the next generation to change our traditions. We can drop what does not work and add what does, just because we decide to. It doesn’t matter whether the tree we have is a felt one stuck on the wall, a huge balsam fir, or a cactus in a pot. We will keep gathering, sharing food and joy, and creating wonderful memories, regardless of the economy.
Michelle C. Herting is a CPA, an accredited business valuation specialist, and an accredited estate planner specializing in succession planning and estate, gift, and trust taxation.